I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize