apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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