Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
