Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
