Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize