All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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