marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
im having a threesome with these popsicles
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Randomize