Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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