I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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