let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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