did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
