Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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