So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
COCAINE IS GR8
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
