dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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