Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
