You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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