i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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