But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
