Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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