TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
