I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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