he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
