No, you can still breathe under the balls.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize