Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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