Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
