thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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