I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
