just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
