Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
third nipple confirmed
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
