I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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