oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I met the friendliest cop last night
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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