She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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