Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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