Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
