new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
