I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
