Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?

  (850): View more from Florida

  I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife

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  (850): Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave? (850): I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife http://tfl.nu/5iik
  Replies (85) Good night (38113) Bad night (1621)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.

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  (305): I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming. http://tfl.nu/oxhe
  Replies (139) Good night (1617) Bad night (37767)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door

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  (413): Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door http://tfl.nu/oj7i
  Replies (57) Good night (1410) Bad night (9524) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me

  (847): View more from Illinois

  No promises.

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  (773): Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me (847): No promises. http://tfl.nu/emuw
  Replies (33) Good night (5446) Bad night (884)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.

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  (678): Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi. http://tfl.nu/4g6k
  Replies (11) Good night (3470) Bad night (1052) Order T-Shirt
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  (220): View more from

  Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.

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  (220): Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me. http://tfl.nu/ml84
  Replies (14) Good night (2453) Bad night (941) Order T-Shirt
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.

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  (304): Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh. http://tfl.nu/3wcj
  Replies (4) Good night (1744) Bad night (676) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route

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  (519): Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route http://tfl.nu/dfjg
  Replies (6) Good night (3039) Bad night (644) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?

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  (917): will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight? http://tfl.nu/ex8f
  Replies (3) Good night (1120) Bad night (478) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING

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  (780): let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING http://tfl.nu/vf6d
  Replies (7) Good night (1908) Bad night (510)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants

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  (719): there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants http://tfl.nu/vcqy
  Replies (9) Good night (771) Bad night (629) Order T-Shirt
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now

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  (204): Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now http://tfl.nu/dal2
  Replies (15) Good night (435) Bad night (2438) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show

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  (719): Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show http://tfl.nu/2ff1
  Replies (4) Good night (746) Bad night (420) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.

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  (+44): I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no. http://tfl.nu/bvly
  Replies (2) Good night (449) Bad night (194) Order T-Shirt
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  (693): View more from

  You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml

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  (693): You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml http://tfl.nu/qfop
  Replies (4) Good night (232) Bad night (411)

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