I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
