You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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