the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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