My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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