He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize