Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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