Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Randomize
