hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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