i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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