Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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