marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
