Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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