Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
